Secret No More: living as my true self, and transitioning gender in the FCO

FLAGG member Sophie Green shares her personal story about her gender identity and transition.

I joined the office over 13 and a half years ago, and, during that time, everyone has known me as Karl. However, as of now, I am going to be known as Sophie.

I identify as transgender. Outside of the office I’ve been living under my true identity since December 2014. And now I have decided to live under this identity all of the time, including at work.

Living a double life, being myself outside of work, and hiding my true self at work, was not easy. In November, I was attending a lot of events with friends in a personal capacity after work. I was fully open about my identity with my friends, and wanted to attend these events as myself. However, I still had my day job to do, and wasn’t yet out under my true identity at work.

Most of these events took place near Oxford Circus. Previously, before I was out with my friends, I would come into the office, and after work I would walk to Oxford Circus. However, last November, I didn’t do this. In order not to reveal my true identity at work, I would work from home, and then travel into London for the events. This felt silly, but, also, at the time, it felt necessary.

I wasn’t yet comfortable with the idea as coming out as myself at work. I was concerned about what everyone would think. I was afraid that there would be some people who wouldn’t be understanding of my identity, that I would face adversity if I came to work as myself.

But I was also feeling unhappy about my situation, and so I eventually decided to go ahead, and fully come out at work, to start living as my true self all of the time.

I am pleased to say that everyone in the office that I’ve come out to has been fully accepting and understanding of my gender identity. I’ve had many offers of support, with people asking what they can do to help me. And when I came out publicly on the intranet, the level of support I received was heart-warming. This level of acceptance is gratefully appreciated, and genuinely helps make my gender transition process easier.

It is important as an organisation that we always make our colleagues feel welcome and supported at work. When people feel that they can be their authentic selves in all aspects of their lives, they are generally much happier for it.

I have been aware that I was trans from when I was a child, and there were many years where I was unhappy with my life, due to my gender identity, and my perceived need to hide it. I felt unable to talk about it to anyone. But I am glad to say that things are changing. British society as a whole is generally becoming more accepting of the transgender community, and the challenges that they face. Things may not be perfect yet, but things are moving in the right direction.

My experience of coming out within the FCO has, so far, been a positive one. I feel accepted and supported, and I thank you all for ensuring that this is the case.

Further information: Please feel free to read my FAQ about my gender identity and transition.